Easily Misunderstood
by Wizard Slayer
Summary: Come aboard the Pillar of Autumn! Where You'll meet: Master Chief, Cortana, Captain Keyes, the Marines, and more!


A/N: I have not read any of the Halo books due to lack of interests and disease that any good game or movie cannot be read by me. It's probable that you will encounter a multitude of grammatical errors but that's what you get for not having an adequate elementary education...   
  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------   
  
I always wanted to know what was inside a Covenant organ system. Now that I know it sickens me to the point of death... literally.  
  
- A foolish marine before the Battle of Reach  
  
Back then nobody knew the consequences of life till...  
  
Captains' log Pillar of Autumn  
  
Date: Nov. 4, 2552  
  
We barely manage to escape from the Covenants back at Reach. The exhilarating noises of guns, screams of agony, and other menaces have shattered my mind. I can still hear those intense sounds. I believe that we are the only surviving crew. Many have fallen.  
  
"Captain! Captain! Hello? Cortana to Captain please respond!" Cortana the AI was glowing on her place, the Captain had fallen asleep while talking about their escape from Reach.  
  
The Captain: let's say he has 40 years of age, he has an interesting background, but in the long run his later image is macabre. Lets stick with his military background. He has 26 years into his military career. The Captain commands respect as a keen strategist and charismatic leader of his men (e.g. Theodore Roosevelt or Ulysses Grant). He became somewhat a hero early in his career, when he led a small group of security troops against a Covenant ambush of the colony ship Meriweather Lewis and held them off long enough for the ship to escape. His many decorations and years of combat experience against the Covenant made him a natural choice to command the Pillar of Autumn and its secret cargo.  
  
"Huh?" The Captain finally replied.  
  
"Finally! You fell asleep when were up to the Covenant part, would you like to hear more sir?"  
  
Cortana is the high advance AI at the heart of the Pillar of Autumn. Her design allows her to be uploaded into an appropriately configured battle suit for safekeeping. She is capable of hacking into alien computer systems, and has used the skill to intercept Covenant communications during combat. She interprets this data to provide her caretakers with directional waypoints and the best available information about troop movement and other additional useful information.  
  
"Let me think about it", the Captain focused his mind on the last battle scene on Reach, "No." The last think he needed was a cup of Quee Queg's Coffee, and those covenant needed to die. "Wait... Covenant?"  
  
"Yes, Covenant coming at four o'clock".  
  
"Okay, everyone to their battle stations! We're going to kick some Covenant fundaments..."  
  
"Wait!" Cortana interrupted.  
  
"Yup. That's when you come in. You hold all the data: Earth, Weapons, Food, and Earth."  
  
"But Captain!"  
  
"And one more thing... let's give our friend a warm welcome."  
  
"That's not what I mean!" Cortana yelled in frustration. What was up with the Captain? He's so obtuse, Cortana thought.  
  
"Of course not because you were supposed to say: already done."  
  
"Captain will just shut up and listen! I'm not finished yet!" Before Cortana could berate him even more she was interrupted; a Marine with a helmet burst in by the name of Jenkins.  
  
Jenkins is optimistic. Though he is only a Private, people look up to him as the voice of reason especial his mentor: Sergeant Snoop Johnson. He helps inspirits everyone to honour themselves, and never to surrender to the Circles of Hell. He enjoys the company of others, though some use that to their advantage.  
  
"Sir!" Jenkins stood up straight and glued his hands on his hips. Without looking, he immediately ordered, "Get out of my face you" and then turns around, "Jenkins? Private Jenkins?"  
  
The Captain heard all about this voice of reason soldier and was awed by his influential teachings through others. The Captain once seen Jenkins-  
  
"Um excuse me? Are we going to talk about Jenkins, Jenkins, and Jenkins? I suggest we should continue on, and forget about voice of reason crap and stick to the mission. I mean it's bad enough that the Captain won't listen to a D word I'm saying!" Cortana baffled at the narrator.  
  
"What? I did not baffle back... I TOLD YOU TO MOVE ON!"  
  
"Sir!" Jenkins said again.  
  
"Shut up with the sir, and use your real name, kid. What's up?"  
  
In rage Cortana screams, "For the love of . This has nothing to do with the movie or book! The Captain is not listening to me, and he's talking to a private! A Private! The lowest rank of the marines! And would you look at this setting! The captain has a chair with the main viewing screen of space, and he can also use this big screen for watching movies! You're supposed to watch for the Covenant ships!"  
  
"This is so funny!" Said an unidentified Director that wishes to keep his work classified.  
  
"This is even on tape when it's during the Brink of War !" Not even Cortana's screaming interfered with Jenkins and the Captain.  
  
"Sarge said that the Covenants are coming at four o'clock. But they would like to talk to you first." Jenkins explained, in which he came to the Bridge.  
  
"Oh, you mean they will arrive at four o'clock?" The Captain asked.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
And then the star of the show walked in... MASTER CHIEF! Parade music played; everyone on the Bridge cheered and danced.  
  
Master Chief, the Spartan Warrior or how ever one calls him, is a powerful figure and can also be a great friend. Not only is he an intrepid machine, but also he respects nature and its surrounding environments. "Wait... No way! I'd blast those Covenant fools and shove their organs on the barks of adjacent trees. In battle we just do our objective and nature should be the least to worry about." Master Chief retorted back at the narrator.  
  
"Chief? You come later!" Cortana tried to warn him from encountering too many fans. However, there is definitely no Halo without Master Chief; otherwise you can forget it!  
  
"That's right... see for your self. They wanna talk now." Master Chief said.  
  
"Big screen please!" The Captain partied... I mean said.  
  
Everyone watches in awe except for Cortana, since she is really annoyed. The screen rolls down, all the lights turn off, and inflatable chairs pop up with popcorn.  
  
"Have a seat Cortana you look annoyed", Keyes offered and Cortana just growls.  
  
"He's on!" Chief screams in excitment.  
  
Now the big screen shows an Elite sitting on an armchair, and some grunts and jackles running around in confusion.  
  
"Greetings: Captain Keyes, Master Chief, young man or should I say Private, and my my Cortana with an annoyed face." Cortana just throws popcorn at the screen and told the Elite to die.  
  
"Now is not the time to party. We Covenant destroyed your planet Reach because we honour our gods, and obey their commands. I heard there are more human races, am I not correct?"  
  
Keyes, Jenkins, and Master Chief nod in agreement. "Yes there are more human races out there", said Keyes.  
  
"Where?" The Elite was now eager to lay hands on easily received information. This seems easier than I thought. Unless, their a bunch of retards, the elite speculated.  
  
"What's your name?"  
  
"Oh dear, oh dear. I forgot to properly introduce myself. You see my name is Elite Genocidal. I am there and coming here to... Destroy the last of you puny little humans! When I find you I'll grind you and blast you to oblivion!"  
  
"Oh no!" Jenkins yelled in fear.  
  
"Oh yes!" Elite Genocidal continued laughing his malicious sounds. It seemed too easy. He was going to go there with his Special Operatives: Covenant Oh 5 and kill them all. Yes, another victory for the undying Covenant. Not much is known about Elite Genocidal and his crew since he did not deliver the papers, yet.  
  
"Keyes, I tried to tell you!" Cortana tries to tell the Captain about an upcoming attack.  
  
"Cortana don't ever do that again! You should have warned me about those Covenant bastards! Now we are faced with the Brink Of War! If you told me earlier then we would be ready to charge them with our Knowlege of Power! You are a disgrace to this ship, and especially me! Don't you dare say my name again!" Keyes I mean the Captain then takes his favorite pistol from his pocket and slowly reloads.  
  
"You are mad at me since I said your name? Not because I didn't warn you about the Covenant?"  
  
Master Chief then warns her, "You know how Jacob feels about his name being used in the-"  
  
"Whoa! Now That's one mighty tough face! Laters y'all... change of plans; I ain't coming at four. Don't wanna mess with this-"   
  
The Captain signs off the screen before the Elite could say anything else.  
  
"Run", Jenkins managed to say.  
  
Master Chief picked up Jenkins and clicked the AI in his head. Thus began the long run; Chief running to safety, and the Captain firing his pistol at them. They ran all the way to the cafe (actually he stopped after he left the big room).  
  
Even though the blame was on Cortana, she still yelled, "CHIEF IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT! THIS WOULD NEVER HAPPENED IF YOU-" At that instant Chief took in his arms and ...  
  
"You know this isn't a hanky-panky!" said a group of marines. They are a rugged and diverse assortment of soldiers; the Marines on the Pillar of Autumn are fighting a losing battle again the Covenant's superior weaponry and numbers. Under the leadership of Captain Keyes they continue to wage a furious struggle against the Covenant, even as their numbers dwindle. They're the best of the best - but they're only human.  
  
Cortana and Chief turned around and saw about a dozen marines gazing and mouths wide open. Private Jenkins was just smiling. One of the Lieutenants named Bogart, looked and waved; he wore a shady hat. Sergeant Snoop Johnson, who had dark colored skin, had his mouth wide opened. Another Sergeant, who had a southern accent named Grant, was also speechless.   
  
Cortana and Chief could let out an Oh.  
  
"No problem, just invite us to your house!" Jenkins tried to compromise.  
  
"Jenkins!" Chief retaliated with anger and embarrassment.  
  
"What? Was it something I said?"  
  
Bogart then advised, "I would make a run for it Wallace."  
  
Jenkins then runs around the cafe with Chief behind trying to catch him and maybe give him a swirly. Chief would not let a private embarrass him. The Marines and Cortana could only crack up and watch.  
  
"Boy, he has a lot to learn!" Snoop told Grant.  
  
"Yeah", Grant replied.  
  
to be continued 


End file.
